Idk how much more i can take!

So ive came to the conclusion in my head im done living like this and i am filing for divorce! Maybe i have poor choice in men or idk men see me and see maybe a come up a place to live idk or maybe they just come so insecure and DAMAGED! My husband goes through my purse and find my apple watch and proceed to go through my messages he see messages from my bestfriend and we were venting and i basically said im going to be by myself for awhile and im not having anymore kids and how my husband takes my birth control patches off everytime i put a new one on. So she replies saying how all the guys would want me and i reply yea i know maybe i have to start being mean and stop flirting and again mentioned im not having no more kids. So instead of him coming to me and asking what is this about or hey i went snooping in your purse , took your car and car keys and went through your watch he screenshot the message and sends me that and saying hes not dumb he knows im this or that smh he already think all women are whores and bitches so he thinks that of me. But he NEVER confront me and have a talk. We have each others passcodes but i NEVER get close to his phone or watch because he takes the phone literally everywhere even in the bathroom. I always have mine open idc i have nothing to hide i literally have no life i stay at home work from home take care of the kids with no help while he finds a way to go gamble every weekend or owe someone money. I deleted facebook because of him. Im just over this i cant keep living my life like this. He is gone with my car and he took his car keys smh anything could happen. Lord tell me im not CRAZY!