Vent post

I just don’t understand why people continue arguments. Like do like to be miserable? Do you enjoy being angry and argumentative? Do you like conflict? You don’t want peace in your life? I’ve been arguing with my mom since the day I was born. We’ve never gotten along. And I have two sisters who are also always fighting. Then there’s my “boyfriend” or the father of my two kid’s who lives with us. We’ve been fighting for over 7 years now. Everything is a constant conflict I want to take my kids and go, just move somewhere new and get a fresh start. I am so sick of fighting with everyone all the time. I want peace and serenity and happiness. I want to buy an rv and just live in our tiny home with my two sons and myself just traveling and living in the most beautiful places seeing the most incredible sights. I’m so tired of fighting. It never ends. 😭 I’m so desperate to feel loved and have a sense of security that I stay and forgive and continue to get hurt by everyone around me. I don’t have any friends anymore because I stopped seeing everyone years ago. I had a better relationship with my mom when we were living 1,104 miles away than I do now that we’re back home and about 20 mins away. I want to buy a house on a nice piece of land and fix it up all myself just to be able to say I did it without the help of anyone because I don’t need anyone besides my kids. I want to go and just be away from everyone. The fun we would have together, the memories we would make, just being happy and with them instead of being miserable and upset and shutting down almost every day. I wish I had the money. It’s so sad I’m stuck in this situation because of money. I should be able to enjoy my kids and my life without needing thousands and thousands of dollars. And I have a decent savings! But still not enough even for a crappy fixer upper.