Feeling like a piece of crap

I hate my husbands job. I've hated it for years. I have seeked personal therapy and even couples therapy to help with this but I still can't seem to jump on board with it. He works a ton of hours weekends and all holidays (he has no choice on his schedule) I just miss him. Been married 13 years hes my best friend. He knows that I struggle and hes asked me for support while he took this new very wanted dream career and i told him i would support him but I regret ever jumping on board. I just want my husband back I'm tired of crying when he leaves. I have no appitie due to stress. I feel like the worst wife ever right now. How come I cant just be supportive. Instead I cry. I work full time so it's hard to spend alot of time together even though we do try and schedule date nights and if time permits little getaways. I just dont think I can continue this feeling of being alone. I know its not fair to him to have to give up his job especially one he's wanted for years. I feel like I've exhausted all options. I love I'm with all my heart and I dont want to lose him but I'm not happy. How do I deal with my sadness that's turning to depression. Its been over 2 years. Please no rude comments I'm already crying as I type this.