We’re both first responders… Will it work?

Ha

Hayley

I’m (19F) currently an EMT-b working on a fire department. I’ll eventually be going to school to get my paramedic and firefighter certifications. Also to include, In the Army National Guard. My bf (26M) is currently in the police academy to become a full time police officer.

Recently, he started the academy and I’ve been working day shifts for training. Our schedules right now are pretty similar.

Right now, the only problem I feel is that we never have much time together. After we both get home we are preparing for the next day, eating dinner, then going to bed. I’m not sure if it’s just not feeling right to me because I’m not used to this adult type of relationship or If something is actually wrong.

We’ve been together for 6 months now, a few of which I was in army basic training, and we’ve been going pretty strong.

We’ve been talking about plans in the future, yes I know it’s so soon to be talking about, and we want the same things in life. Marriage, a house, kids, etc.

The only worry I have with that is what it’ll be like with us both working those jobs. He said we can make our schedules match up so we work the same days, nights, overnights, etc with our crazy schedules which I’m sure will work for the time being. Later on, definitely years from now, we want kids and that’s my biggest worry.

When we do have children he said we can always have babysitters, our parents watching them, etc. I just have the fear of our kids growing up wondering where mommy and daddy are and why their friends have their parents with them every night but they don’t.

I’m assuming we can both try to eventually get full time day shift schedules to fix that but you can never be certain.

It’s very cute saying we’re both first responders but I’m not sure if our career choices will work out in the end. I don’t want either of us have to stop doing what we love.

Any advice is appreciated!

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COMMENT (3)

Kk

Posted at
I’m an EMT-B and my boyfriend of a year is a EMT-I. It definitely gets hard sometimes and you miss your person a lot but it gets easier. You grow to appreciate the time apart and learn how to cherish your time together even more. One thing that has helped us is when it’s our days off together we try not to bring up work at all. You’ve got this!!!

Sh

Posted at
I’d say that if ur relationship is strong and u feel that this is ur person, don’t give up on it for something like careers. If u really want it, u can make it happen. Like the previous poster said, it’s going to be tough but hopefully with seniority your schedules will match up better. Good luck!

Ly

Posted at
Oh girl I feel for you. My husband is a first responder and let me tell you its definitely been hard to juggle our schedules. I have a set schedule but his switches all the time and I often have to comprise so much (being alone and him always working). we are due with our first next month and I often worry that he will always be gone the holidays as well and that our daughter will miss out on her Dad being around for the Holidays. The only advice I can give you is that hopefully somewhere along the road like you mentioned maybe you can both get into steady schedules where you can be home with your children but I know that's almost near impossible for an officer (least where we live). Also you both are still very young and I'm sure children would come a lot later in your lives and by then you'll have more seniority with your jobs. I hope it all works out for you both though! being a first responder is such a tough but rewarding career and you both should be so proud!