I gave birth to my daughter on December 29th, since then I’ve been having my own health problems. I still pass out randomly, am tired 24/7, my back was messed up from the epidural. I’ve been diagnosed with PP depression and anxiety.

My boyfriend works W,T,F & S. 6:45 to 5:30. My mom also works but she doesn’t have a definite schedule. When they work I get dropped off at my grandmothers for a break. Except it isn’t, while I’m there I’m forced to clean, take care of the baby, I also have to do my own personal hygiene since the place were staying doesn’t have a good hot water heater. My boyfriend comes home from work and immediately jumps on his phone or our switch. My mom just immediately wants to relax and complains about pain. These are problems for me.

I knew what I was getting into when I had my daughter, but I at least expected help.

I take care of the baby at night, she practically never sleeps and if she does she awakes easily. During the day when they’re at work I can’t sleep then either because my grandmother expects me to clean her house and do a ton of other stuff while the baby is asleep. Then my mom gets back and she takes over, but the baby is usually awake by then and I’m back to caring for her. So if I do get a nap in it’s usually only for maybe 45 minutes.

We leave to grab my boyfriend about 5, the second he gets in the car it’s very rare he says hi to his daughter before hopping on his phone or asking which bag the switch is in. When we get to the house my mom goes to relax and my boyfriend is still doing the same thing as usual, if I ask him to feed her I get a slight attitude but he does do it. By 10 he complains that he needs to go to sleep so he can get up for work in the morning, and which 10 is a key moment when she starts crying because she’s tired and fighting her sleep. He leaves me to deal with it. They both go to sleep and I’m back with our daughter all night with only 45- 2 hours of sleep max.

On the days he doesn’t work he’s either sleeping all day or on the switch/ his phone.

Moving on from the baby and going to the personal needs. I literally get no me time. He’ll spend about 45 minutes in the bathroom “shitting”, when in reality he’s either on pornhub jerking off or on the switch. If he’s not in the bathroom jo he wakes me up from a MAYBE 4 hour nap because he’s horny. Of course I tend to his needs and try to sleep again but my anxiety doesn’t allow me and sometimes I worry about the baby when she’s with my mom.

It’s a total different story for me. I’ll try to take time to play Xbox, color something, nap, paint my nails or some other shit but the second my mom gets back with the baby, all of that is gone. If I get horny over the weekend, it’s like a joke. I’ll mention it or try to start something but usually nothing happens or on a very rare circumstance it’ll be a 5 minute session like he wants to just get it done and over with. Which is messed up considering he needs a 20-30 minute session. I’ll try to get him to spend time with me or the baby and to take a walk but he complains he’s too tired to walk. Trying to get him to spend time with me is a hassle now because he starts saying he has all this stuff to do or he’ll just fall asleep on me/ hop on his phone halfway through a movie or show.

I’m slowly running out of patience and if I don’t get some me time soon I’m going to snap.

You can put your opinion but this was just a rant anyway. If you have advice let me hear it, if it’s just a “well this is how parenting is supposed 69 be.” Save your time and effort.