Last week my husband left for a TDY training (military) for a couple of days. My son’s school was closed because they were doing a staff training. My son has autism, adhd, spd, and odd, so his behavior can be very hard some days (most days) but he thrives in school with a lot of structure and his time at school allows me to take care of errands and whatnot. I also have a 2 year old. So it was very very rough week without any help or reprieve (I have no family or friends around because again, military). I ended up getting a migraine that lasted 3 days. I suffer really bad from migraines and get aura/vision loss and a plethora of other physical symptoms so for those 3 days I was more or less bound to the couch. My son was off the wall crazy and his behavior had me in absolute tears. When my husband came back it was better but he had to go right back in to work a few hours later. So still no real break for me at all. I started feeling better that evening and decided I was going to make a big dinner for my husband of his favorite. Salisbury steaks with mashed potatoes, roasted carrots and veggies, and homemade onion gravy. So I got everything ready and prepped and then realized I didn’t have enough beef. My husband was on his way home at this point so I texted him “hey can you grab 1lb of ground beef at Walmart for me? Making Salisbury steaks” We live right behind a Walmart but I didn’t want to get my son out who was having a meltdown because his sock touched the dog’s bed. (If you have a kid with autism…you’ll know what I’m talking about). My husband texted me “ok!” So I’m sitting there waiting. Waiting. The veggies, mashed potatoes, and gravy are cooking. An hour passes and I’m like what the hell. I check find my iPhone (we track each other’s locations for safety) and he’s at Publix. I’m thinking that’s weird but maybe Walmart was out of beef or something. Eventually he gets home… and walks in with a bag of Firehouse Subs. I’m like “umm where’s the beef?” and he responds “I didn’t get any, thought we could eat this tonight instead.” I gestured towards my kitchen which was clear I was already cooking. I was like “I told you I was making steaks, what am I supposed to do with all of this now? Why didn’t you just get me the beef and the subs if that’s what you wanted?” And he basically blew up at me that he was sorry he was such a disappointment and he was just trying to be nice and not have me cook.

I put all the food away but I just dropped the conversation after that. I didn’t wanna fight because I still was not feeling that well. I get my sub and it’s a sandwich I’ve literally never ordered before. On top of that it had tomatoes on it (which I detest) and he knows that I hate them. I’m like “what’s this?” and he says “thought you could try something new”. I literally only ever get 1 sandwich at Firehouse. Again, I held my tongue, picked off the tomatoes, but it was nasty as hell and covered in mayo. I only ate like three bites. My husband then got angry at me and said I don’t appreciate anything he does. At this point I got really upset and said “I have had the most awful painful week and I was trying to make a home cooked meal for us. I don’t understand why you said okay to me asking for you to pick up the beef. And I don’t understand why you got me a sandwich that you know I wouldn’t like.”

He got upset. I got upset. And we went to bed without a word to each other and now he’s back at work again. I went to Walmart after I dropped my son off at school and got the beef myself this morning so I can make it tonight with all the crap I already had cooked. Then he texted me as I got home “are you done being mean?”

Like??? Am I really the asshole here?!! How was I being mean? I asked you to do 1 dang thing.