last names

I have been with my partner for 4 years I in the last 6 months I talked about changing mine and my 2 previous kiddos names away from my ex name nothing was really said by him about it so we went back to my maiden. changed everything birth certificate ss cards it all ! now we are talking about marriage how should I go about telling him I don't want to go through all that again so I'd like him to take my last name to not have to change the kids named a second time . but hes already said he feels like that's disrespecting his father bu not keeping his last name