How to cope with joint custody

Me and my ex were in a custody battle for a few months. He wanted joint custody of our 3 and 6 year old and I wanted open visitation. Basically he can see the kids whenever he wants but I'm there. I have two reasons. Reason number 1 is he and his girlfriend do Only fans and that's simply not something I want my kids raised around. He argued that they don't know and they don't even know what only fans is but I just personally don't like that. The second reason is I honestly want my kids with me. Having them part time is hard. I don't want to be a part time parent. I love my kids and nothing compares to a mother's love. Especially my 3 year old who's a TODDLER so I'm very attached to her. He just won joint custody. Our agreement is 2+2+3. I get the kids Monday and Tuesday, he gets them Wednesday and Thursday and we alternate Friday -Sunday. This agreement kills me and I have to give them up Wednesday and he will have them until Sunday. I'm having a hard time coping.