Would I be wrong?

Me and my husband have been together for 10 years and have 3 girls, we are expecting our 4th (miracle since we only have sex once a month). Before I conceived, I was already planning on leaving him. I didn’t leave yet because I was looking for a safe way to go and have a roof for my girls and be financially ready. Of course he doesn’t know I was planning to leave him because I know he would’ve gotten violent and I didn’t want to risk that, so I had to act “normal”. Anyways, my plan is still to leave him because he’s an abusive, toxic, manipulative husband and FATHER. He’s treated us all like trash. Because of him, our 8 year old is on antidepressants. I don’t even argue or fight, for the sake of my kids. I’ll do anything to get away.

Anyways, we don’t know the gender of the baby yet but I have a gut feeling it will be a boy. My first boy. (Will confirm very soon). There’s 2 things I want to happen during and after my labor which is 1. I don’t want him to be on the room with me when I have the baby. He triggers my anxiety and the sight of his face makes me want to scream and curse him out for mentally, emotionally damaging me and my kids and I don’t want him to be there to add to my pain and 2. IF this is a boy, I want to name the boy myself . I want to let the nurse know to give me the paperwork for names and all when I am alone, so no one interferes . When we had 3 girls no one bothered from his side , they didn’t care because they were girls , they didn’t care what their names would be, not even him. I named all my girls. And now, everyone is waiting with a list in their hands of boy names, saying oh we have to put the great grandpas name in his name(husbands grandpas name), this and that. NO. None of these fake people deserve to name my child, especially my son. You guys tortured me mentally, emotionally and verbally for years knowing you could because I have no where to go and you think I’m gonna let you decide what my kids name is gonna be or if you should see me give birth. No. Is it wrong for me to want to do these two things? ( BTW this doesn’t mean I’d regret having another girl, I’m just saying what would happen if it’s a boy, because if it’s a girl I know they wouldn’t care, as they did with my other 3)

I wish I could tell you guys all I’ve gone through with this man. I wish I could tell you all how I went from a bratty, spoiled teenager to a faithful loyal wife and mom at just 20 years old and still ended up living in hell. I just can’t let my kids go through this, him and his family are the most disgusting, greedy toxic people ever who care about MONEY and coming to America. ( I was a US citizen since I was 4 years old and he became one after marrying me )