Relationship help

The father of my child and I broke up in 2022 due to domestic violence. He struggled with drug addiction and mental health, could never hold down a job & just wasn’t an active father whilst in our relationship. We rekindled our relationship 10 months ago, and he has started spending nights as of 7 months ago. We rekindled as he had sworn he had changed, he’s held down a job for 15 months, he has been sober for the last 2 years & he is ready to be fully committed. I was hesitant at first, but thought we were so young (19) when we had our son, and he might’ve just needed time to grow and get clean.

Things were going great, we still live separately so we try to take things slow. At first he would spend 4 nights minimum a week, we felt like a team for the first time. For the last month he has dropped back to spending 2 nights a week. Him staying now feels like a chore, he has been calling sick into work and lying about going. We have had several discussions where I’ve stated this isn’t good enough, he has said he will do better every time but nothing changes he blames his mental health.

Saturday night we had this discussion again, yet this time things escalated where it is my fault he isn’t here because I keep bringing up this same conversation that he doesn’t spend enough time & I stress him out.

He then came back later that night high, and tried to deny it.

I feel like an idiot for taking him back and letting him into my life again. I feel co dependent on him and I just feel sad that I thought for once I was being shown love and that I am enough just for it to be taken again. I was meant to drop work back part time now that we are a partnership, and study to finally achieve my goals since we had our child so young. But now that doesn’t seem doable without his support.

I just feel heartbroken. I don’t want to end things I love him, but I don’t know how to make this better