My child is struggling at school.

My son is autistic. He was diagnosed when he was 3 years old. He’s very social. Very intelligent. He has been called charming, and that makes people surprised he is autistic, but he’s literally just mimicking from shows he watches. Like Daniel Tiger. It’s similar to echolalia, which he does that too. He will repeat PBS kids commercials, or phrases he hears family members say. He’s VERY hyperactive and easily distracted. It’s hard to get him to talk to his therapist as he is going from toy to toy. Then randomly starts talking about something else.

He got off the bus the other day and the bus monitor was super hateful towards him AND me telling me that I need to explain to him that he can’t unbuckle his seat belt. He is almost 5, in preschool. And he has autism and ADHD. I asked the bus driver if she knew about it and she said she didn’t. The next day, she said she asked the school and they had no record of it. It’s obvious and I filled out all the paperwork explaining it. And she acted as if I was lying.

I’m at a breaking point, as I have been trying to get him help, I’ve been trying the last 2 years. His meds are not working for him. I homeschooled him last year. He can already do 1st grade level problems. He just has behavioral issues. He can’t comprehend what a stranger is. Doesn’t understand social cues. I’ve cried a few times this week. Now he’s being treated awful because of something he can’t help. And I’m not trying to enable his behavior, but he NEVER unbuckles the seatbelt in the car, and he KNOWS the importance. But if he sees other older kids getting up and walking around the bus, of course he is going to think he can too.

To top it all off, now he has pneumonia.

The last medication made him a zombie, and all he did was want to sleep and he was so unhappy and felt miserable, and when it wore off he was more wild than before. I may start giving it to him again because I’m exhausted. I feel so bad for this.

I just can’t catch a break. I’m a single full time mom of two. My other child is nine months old and clingy. It’s been so hard the last few weeks. I finally got most of my home cleaned. I try talking to my therapist about this, and time ends up running out and I never get much advice or feedback. Like, I’m tired. I know this is what motherhood is. It’s what I signed up for. And I would not trade it for the world because I know what my life was before I had my children and I never want to go back to that. But I just want a safe space to admit how tired I am. 😭