Parents of Athletes, I need your opinion

This is long, but I really need opinions so if you have time please read.

My child is 6 and has participated in organized sports since about 3. We’ve played soccer, t-ball, baseball and swimming. We’ve had a lot of great experiences with phenomenal coaches.

This situation involves swim. This is his second year on a competitive swim team (ages 5-14) they travel, have meets, keep score, and have winners and losers.

Last year, the head coach left a lot to be desired. He was cocky, didn’t interact with the younger kids (left that up to other coaches and assistants), never got into the pool, never cheered anyone on, no positive reinforcement. To be honest I’m not sure if he could even match the kids to their parents by the end of the season. The booster club was run by one mom who had been doing it for years, everything was unorganized and done last minute (for example, no sign up list to stock the concession stand so we didn’t have drinks one week) My kid made a bunch of friends, I made some parent friends, and we weren’t there to be trained for the Olympics so I let it all slide.

Important to note the league has an arrangement with the local high school that they can use the pool for free if they agree not to charge kids in the district to be on the team. Instead of just telling the kids in the district they don’t have to pay and charge the normal fee to everyone else, no one pays. We do pay for the team suits, we pay all our travel expenses, we stock the concession stand for home meets and we fund raise. But joining the team is free.

Now this year. They asked us to recruit. I did. I personally brought about 10 new kids to the team. It grew from 30 kids to 60. Awesome. Sign ups happen. We’re told first practice is 6pm on 10/30.

10/30 rolls around and we get an email around 10am that the pool heater is broken and we won’t be practicing. The email says it should be a week or two until it’s fixed. A week goes by. We hear nothing. On 11/10 I reach out for an update. Two hours later we get an email saying the heater is fixed and practice is a go for 11/13.

We show up for practice the kids go to the pool deck, parents go to the cafeteria that overlooks the pool to hang out while the kids swim. We see the coach talk to the team, the separated them into lanes, kids jump in and start doing laps. 15 minutes later the coach comes up and tells us that the pool heater actually isn’t fixed and the pool is the coldest he’s ever felt it. He gave the kids the option to swim or not, and told them if they get too cold they can get out to warm up.

(In case you missed it, he asked 60 5-14 year olds who love swimming if they would rather swim or leave because the pool was cold)

I ask if there is something the parents can do to help the situation. Can we call the district and put pressure on them? Can I call pool supply stores across the country to find the part we need and get it here? How can we help? Coach tells us do nothing, respect the chain of command. Great.

11/15 they cancel practice because the school is having parent teacher conferences.

11/17 I message and ask if we have any updates on the pool heater and if it’s not fixed do we know what the temp is. My research says <77 degrees is unacceptable for competition and <70 degrees is a hypothermia risk so knowing the temp is important in deciding if I’m going to let me 55lb kid practice.

Booster club emails all the parents and says ‘As you were all informed on Monday, the pool temperature was cold and is still cold today. Whenever we receive new information, we always pass it along to our swim family as soon as we receive it. Practice is not mandatory, so use your own discretion when deciding to bring your children to practice. We will still have practice as our normal 6-7:30.’

Another parent replies all and says ‘What was the temperature of the pool water on Monday? And what is the current temperature?

I want to make an informed decision regarding practice.’

I reply all and say ‘I agree with Amanda. We need more information to make the best decision if we’re going to disappoint our children and say they can’t practice (when they are all ready and willing). There’s a difference between 75 degrees and 50 degrees, both are ‘cold.’’

We get this email from the coach ‘Parents,

We have given you ALL the information that we have been given. We don’t bring a pool thermometer with us to practice to see what the actual temperature is. It is very cold, but I can’t put a number to it. It is a PIAA requirement that a pool be between 78-82 degrees to host a meet. I can tell you it doesn’t FEEL near that point, but again, I wasn’t given a number.

We are a $0 registration swim team. Everyone involved have careers outside of this team, but still dedicate countless hours to making sure it a great experience for the kids each season and do our best to make sure they become better swimmers. If that isn’t acceptable, I encourage you to pursue different options for your children with one of the other local teams where a season costs close to $1,000. Paying that money gives more of a leg to stand on when issues arise. But this will not be the tone set for the season after just one practice.

As stated on Monday, the heat pump for the pool is on backorder. The aquatics director for the district is actively working on this as it needs to be repaired by their first meet which I believe is 12/4. We will continue practicing because we want to give the kids the option to be in the pool even though it is VERY cold. You know your kids better than we do, so you can decide if they should be in the pool or not. It will not be held against them if they are not there right now. If they do come, have them bring an extra towel to have on deck if they get too cold.

When we have new information, it will be passed on to everyone immediately. Otherwise, this is the state we are in for the time being so there will be no more answers regarding pool temperature until there is new information. In case it’s not obvious, this is a very frustrating situation for us as well. If anyone would like to discuss further, you can contact me directly at 999-999-9999’

One of the other parents is a teacher in the district, she texted a friend at the high school, they checked the temperature for us, within 2 hours we knew the pool was 72 degrees. You can’t tell me this coach, who works with the school regularly, couldn’t have made a call or sent a text and got this information as easily as this parent did.

I have no replied to his email. We did not go to practice. I reached out to a team that’s about 20 minutes further away from my house, practices 4 days a week, and costs $400 to join. I haven’t heard back. But I know they’ve been practicing since the end of August, so it’s a long shot.

Now here’s where I want opinions. If this other team says no, am I really going to let my kid stay on this team for the rest of the season with this awful coach? Do we sit out this season and pick up again next year? Do I keep my mouth shut, wait for the heater to be fixed and show up? Do I ask him what makes him think it’s acceptable to speak to adults the way he did? Do I spam him with links to ‘how to be a coach 101’ books?

This child is a fish, loves swimming and is pretty good at it, it’s great exercise, we made a lot of friends here. But at the same time, they’re 6, one season wouldn’t kill them. They know the pool is broken, they know the coach and I don’t see eye to eye. They aren’t against a team switch and said ‘Coach E doesn’t even say hi to me when I walk onto the deck, he won’t care if we change teams’ but they also say they want to swim.