I’m sure I need to

I’m sure I need to break up with my current partner but I’m too scary. I was supposed to be completely done with him in December 2023 because he got really mad at me and he said “You can die today bitch, I don’t care if you die” And if I’m not mistaken he said “I’ll kill you if I can” something to that effect. He threatened to come up to my job when this happened in December as well, to come take my car that he bought FOR ME in October 2023, because it’s “his” car. It’s registered in my name and he doesn’t have a license nor a car. I lost that job because I had to call off last minute, I was in the parking lot about to go in but he wouldn’t stop calling me blocked and saying he on his way to my job, I had left cause I feared for my life and I know he will walk to my job because he walked to my moms house before (5 miles) after he threatened me in 2022. I wouldn’t come out the house that time so he left. But he was outside making so much noise. Anyway.

Feb 11, this year, I got really drunk and apparently I messaged him, I woke up the next day at his house, in his bed, we had sex and I haven’t stopped talking to him since but I don’t want to be with him, I don’t want anything to do with him. He calls me his girl and everything. He acts like everything is okay and I don’t make it any better by being around, I make it seem like nothing is wrong. I walk on eggshells everyday because anytime I express my feelings I get ignored or it starts an argument. We don’t get along, all we do is have sex, watch movies, smoke and argue. He doesn’t work. I work nights. He rather make music in his living room or go to the studio to make it. Last time, not even a month ago, he went to the studio from 12am at midnight till 8am the next morning and i should’ve left him then, cause that was unacceptable, all night and morning.

He’s 30 and been writing and doing this music stuff since he was 7. I just want to be done with this. I really need help, “just leave” isn’t feeling, if it was that easy I wouldn’t be on here after weeks of wanting to leave, asking for help in different ways to leave. I would just be gone. Family and friends don’t want to help because they feel like I keep going back, which is true. This time I want to leave and be gone. My family and friends barely talk to me, so I figured this may help.

Anyone have any advice other than “block him” “cut all contact” “stop talking to him” I CAN’T cause when I do, it becomes extra, now he’s made more pages, made a fake text now number, he talks shit on Facebook about me, to his friends and to his family. He’s calling me all types of names, etc. What would you do?