Surprised at the guilt

Today I was talking to a man about babysitting arrangements for his son. I learned both parents work and the child was in the care of a babysitter for 7 hours each day the child was being watched. The man explained that this schedule worked really well for them because the child was not in the care of another person for long. His wife has a very good job and works three days a week.

The surprise:

All of this sounds normal to me. I was surprised at the guilt I felt following this conversation. I have always wanted to be home with my children from the time I was young. I felt this was the best way to know my children were being raised as my husband and I would like, among other things.

This did not stop me from reaching goals I have always had in my life by way of education. I have two degrees and held respectable positions at work. When our first child was born, I went back for a month while my husband finished his masters degree and came home when he got a job to support our family.

This is the plan my husband and I have had from the beginning.

I was thrown off by the guilt I felt to know my husband is working so hard for me to be home with our children and that I could easily get a job to assist with the finances. I did not expect the feeling as it has never come before.

The support:

I talked with my husband about my feeling guilty and he jumped right into defense mode. "You're doing what's best for our family." "I am totally fine working." "You don't need to feel guilty." And so on. I explained to him that I didn't want to alter anything about our situation or arrangement but simply that I didn't expect to feel that way when talking to the gentleman earlier.

Conclusion:

It made me realize, again, how supportive and invested my husband is of and in our decision for me to stay home to be with our children. This also helped me realize no matter what we chose to do in our lives, others will do it differently or the same as that choice. I have no reason to feel guilty for doing what we feel is best for our family. 

I am grateful to my husband for his constant love and support to me.