Very hard for me to post this,

Erm I don't really no where to start but I'll try so I'm 25 have a fantastic relationship with my partner who is also the father to our 10 month old son in my personal life I could not ask for much more, but my head is completely fucked (mind my language) when I was younger I got sexually abused which is something I have had to deal with mentally for most part of my life and I've become very good at it and I've learned to make the most out of my life but theres things I can't do, I will not get a taxi by myself I need a light on at night even if it's the hallway I'm so nervous about everything I over analyse everything if I'm on a train I will take myself into thinking that it's going to crash and kill everyone I'm like this on a motorway or plane , I never used to be that bad but as I've got older it seems to be getting worse, but the I seriously think everyday something is wrong with me if I've got a headache I think ivegot a brain tumour , I always think I am unwell and my partner thinks I'm crazy in a funny way but for me it is not funny it's so stressful because I really think in my head I have illnesses I can't explain it and I panic that much I can't hardly breath , it's effecting my life more than anyone else realises as everyone thinks oh she's funny but itsnot, I no if I go doctors they will try give me some pills but I don't want that I just don't no what to do