Approaching due date

I had an abortion 7 months ago and since then I have thought about that baby several times. It's now approaching the due date of what would have been a beautiful little girl or boy. I've been feeling down about it. Me and my boyfriend made the decision together to do this. He's been by my side and with me every step of the way. Even tried to get me pregnant 3 months after the abortion. He thinks about that baby as well. It would have been his first child and my second child. Sometimes I feel like it will never happen again or that I'm being punished for making the decision months ago. I'm having baby fever so bad and seeing alot of women pregnant right now only making it worst. I have been hiding how I feel about this from him. I want to talk about it but I honestly just don't know how to truly feel. What can I do to be more open to him about it because he's willing to listen.