Husband can’t seem to handle tasks given to him

So my husband is a good man. Hard working... at his work. But at home, he doesn’t do much of anything. When he comes home he doesn’t really interact with our kids at all. Doesn’t play with them. Doesn’t talk to them. Doesn’t do much of anything except eat and watch tv and fall asleep. On his days off, he is similar. He wants to watch tv all day. He groans about it if I ask him to come to the park with me and the kids or something. If I ask anything of him, like “hey can you please hang up this shelf for me?” or “hey can you wash the dog?” he absolutely will not do it, or complain the entire time and be really mean and snappy towards me and the kids. I can’t give him any sort of task. I literally do everything around our house, absolutely everything. I cannot even ask him to change a light bulb or he will groan about it. It’s like he must put 100% of his energy into his job and leave nothing for his family and his house. He is a good provider but that is all he has really become because he doesn’t involve himself in anything else. I work too, by the way, and still have to do everything else, all the cleaning, any repairs, and 100% of taking care of the kids who are only 3 and 1. I hate to say he’s lazy because he’s very hardworking at his job (he is in the military), but it’s like he cannot do anything else or he just loses his shit. Any advice at how to approach this subject with him?