Vasectomy Regret

So DH and I have been married 8 years, we have two kids a boy and a girl. I was convinced I didn’t want anymore kids because my pregnancies weren’t easy and we live on the west coast and both our families live in the Midwest so we’re all alone as far as help from family goes. My husband had a vasectomy a year ago, I was in 100% support.

Well now a year later it’s my deepest regret. When he asked if I was done having kids I said yes because I knew he was completely done. But also if he has said no he wanted more I would’ve happily agreed so I guess I was indifferent? Anyways it’s been eating at me how much I desperately want another baby. I’ve told him and we’ve talked about it twice. He doesn’t want a reversal and it’s expensive anyways. I totally understand and it’s his choice. I just wish I hadn’t been so

quick to say I was done having kids. I can’t even say how much I cry over it hoping that my period will be late and we will be one of those couples who gets a miracle baby, but even if we were I’d be scared because I know he doesn’t want more kids. I don’t want to bring it up to him anymore because I don’t want him to feel bad especially since his decision is firm so I’m just voicing it here to get it off my chest.

How do you deal with vasectomy regret? I feel like this is all my fault and I shouldn’t have said I was done so soon. Just heartbroken. Hoping anyone else understands.