Between a rock and a hard place

Things aren't so happily ever after in my home.... my husband is no prince charming and I'm having a hard time right now making the right decision.... we are trying to have a third baby but as of lately my attraction to him has basically fallen in a sink hole!!! He's mean and talks down to me I have dealt with it for ten years and it's gotten to the point where I can't make up my mind if I want out or not... I love who he was and know deep down he is still the same man but lately it's hard to see him... right now I'm scared shit less that I am pregnant!! I don't know what I am going to do if I am!! I'm going on my second day late and don't want to take a test now because I don't want to see a positive if I am pregnant right now.... I know there are men out there that would love me more than he does and who would treat me better but to give on ten years with a man that I already have two kids with is hard.... I just don't know anymore and talking to my friends at home seems wrong cause they are his friends too... I feel lost and depressed... I really wish the answer would fall in my lap!!!