My husband seems less than excited.

I just need a safe place here..

I recently found out that I’m possibly pregnant. All tests I have taken, about 8, have had a faint line within the timeframe. I have yet to get a BFP. I shared my news with my husband, more in disbelief and he seemed less than excited. He didn’t believe me, said he can’t see anything (he’s color blind) said the tests weren’t accurate. It deflated me. I asked him if he would be upset if I wasn’t actually pregnant and he said no.

It took us three and a half years to get pregnant with our daughter. We only decided last month, the week of my predicted ovulation window, we were ready to start trying for another baby. With our history of infertility, I’m flabbergasted at the VFP on the pregnancy tests, that’s why I have taken so many. I didn’t even know I actually ovulated.

I recently accepted a new job. So if I am pregnant my maternity leave would be unpaid, that’s one reason he’s not excited. While I understand, I’m also making about $15k more a year so to me that compensates the unpaid leave, I can set like $500 a paycheck aside while pregnant to have money for bills on leave.

Another reason is he said our 1.5 year old daughter is a handful already and he isn’t ready to add another child in the mix. She’s a toddler.. she’s going to be a bit wild and have her bad days.. she’ll also be 9m older and have more than 20 words in her vocabulary.

I just wish he would understand how amazing it is for us to potentially be pregnant after one month of trying, instead I’m left sitting here thinking this is a mistake and he won’t be excited if it’s confirmed. Infertility killed me mentally and it almost ruined our marriage.. I never want to go through that again.

I’m waiting until I’ve calmed down to talk to him about this. I don’t really want to get angry or cry🥴