Help me any advance please

Ok here is my short story I married my husband and it’s been 5 yrs married now he is in the military. So I’ve been overseas for 2 yrs with him okay so here comes the situation. He is 30 and I’m 26 all my friends and family know that we are married BUT his parents don’t! He doesn’t want them to hate him for getting married without them knowing so he wants to do a wedding just so his family can be happy so now I have pcos I have an iud for 3 yrs now but I want a kid and he keeps telling me we have to do the weeding first because he doesn’t want his family to start shit but in all honesty I don’t give two rats about his family they are manipulating people I kinda want to take off my iud and not tell him but idk what to do I’m not getting younger and my body isn’t the best I atleast want to try for one baby with my low chances per a doctor visit I had what do y’all think i should do … advice if you were in my shoes TIA ps I have money safe up and my parents are more than happy to help me if I were to get pregnant is it selfish that I want to have a baby 🥺😭