Not wanting to go out for Valentine's day with my husband

Am I terrible? I don't want to go out because I'm honestly just losing attraction to my husband. When we first met he was perfect. He had muscle. Confidence. Was a protector. A provider. Super masculine. Everything you want on a man. We've been together 9 years and so much has changed. He had some memories from childhood that he completely blocked out come back when his dad died. There's some trauma he went years having no memory of and his dad dying brought them all back so he got depressed. I have tried to be there but it's hard seeing someone who's always been the strong one in the relationship just collapse. It feels like I'm wearing the pants in the relationship and that's a turn off for me. He is currently seeing a therapist and has gained weight from the antidepressants. He did start exercising again but his step brother basically had to pull it out of him and by exercising it's him going to the gym and a jog with his step brother once a week. Not enough to have any real weight loss. I have never been attracted to emotional men and he's been really emotional the last year and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do about it. I just want my big strong man back. Not this woopie he has become..I don't want to go out together because when I look at him I'm not seeing a dominant man and that's just not attractive to me.