Am I wrong to just sneak out?

I am in a relationship with a man, that at one point, was physically abusive. I had him arrested, we spent two months apart and then I decided to give him another chance because he said he would never put his hands on me again. He was/is also controlling and manipulative. It's been 2 years since we got back together, he hasn't put his hands on me once but he is still controlling and manipulative. I'm not happy, I'm not in love with him anymore and I want to leave. I've told him this, multiple times. We have two children together. I am the primary caregiver, I do everything with them. He is a completely hands-off parent. The only thing he does is buy toys for them and give them kisses at nap and bedtime. Whenever I tell him I want to leave, he says fine, you can go, but you aren't taking the kids or if you leave with the kids, I will destroy you in court. I know that if someone shows up to pick me and the kids up, he will physically stop me from leaving with the kids. Not in an abusive way, but by holding one or both. The law in my state is for equal rights for both parents, married or not, and the police won't get involve in it unless something illegal is being done.

What I am trying to find out is, am I wrong for having someone come get me early in the morning so that I am able to sneak out with the kids? I feel like if I don't do it this way, I will never get out and I will never leave without my children.