I’m tired 😢

I want to leave my husband so much but I keep talking myself into staying or I’ll let him talk me into staying. He tells me this wonderful story like he didn’t mean it and it really wasn’t a big deal but to me it crossing lines and actually cheating. He’s constantly trying to flirt with women on social media and I have plenty of proof it when I confront him..all I hear is lies and how he doesn’t know how it got on his phone🙄. I’m so tired of going in circles with him...what makes it so bad our 6th year marriage anniversary is coming up and it just all hurts so much and we have kids together and just bought a home together on my land. I’m so scared but I feel it’s the right thing to do. These are some of the stuff he’s allowing on Snapchat. I don’t think he should be sending or receiving pictures and the lady sent a video of herself naked and actually turns around...😢 I’m just so tired 😓 He keeps making the same mistakes over and over. Maybe 2 weeks ago we talked about some thing in his Snapchat and he decided to delete it but has I back again. I’ve asked him 3 times over the past 2 years to let’s go to marriage counseling together but it’s always no. He’s always telling women online they are gorgeous and talking about meeting up with them. Idk if he does or not I’d like to think he doesn’t but idk.