Is this normal? What should I do?

So I wanna break up with my boyfriend like really badly and I think I’m going to. But I’m just so scared like if he’s gonna leak stuff or that he might get mad at me or I’m gonna make his life even worse than it already is, I’m scared that I’m not gonna find anyone else like that he’s my last choice and that’s it I don’t get anyone else. I don’t wanna hurt him but I don’t like how much he has hurt me.