I don't know what love is?

Kidda not sure waht love is like i don't remember the last time my dad said I love you to me. And my mom i only remember this year and she said it like 3 times in a year. And when my mom said it that to me today i felt lost at how to react. I get uncomfortable when i have to touch people or I accidentally touch people like even a touch to the shoulder or a hug like i tense up. And I'm really fan of reading and not a single story can tell me what love is other that dying 4 the other pearson.