WHY HE WONT COMMIT

Question

so this guy and i have been in a talking stage for so long like a year, but i just moved into his city and we've been hanging out, he literally wants to buy everything for me😭😭 he's the sweetest even the perfume i want which cost so much, and he paid for my uber even tho i already etranned him and my money was just sent back, but we're not dating. He cares a lot and I can tell, he buys everything literally everything!! but why won't he commit? 💀💀 and yes we have been intimate, ive met all his friends, he's always available like he's the best ive met but he hasnt commit

Answer

I don’t think it matters that he buys you things... that doesn’t make him sweet. It makes him either generous or highly calculating. The fact that this is how he’s been treating you... well... it means zero things.

You need to look for marks of character, and you need to look long and hard is you expect to discern anything from your observations early on. The good news is... people almost always show you who they really are, eventually.

I honestly don’t even know what you mean by “he won’t commit” (it’s just not very clear) but if he straight up doesn’t want to be exclusive with you then he’s either:
Not monogamous (perhaps at this time, perhaps in general)
Not emotionally available for a serious relationship, or he’s just
 Not that into you.

If he isn’t monogamous, and you are, don’t lower your standards. You have needs, and your standards are in place for a reason. Let him know what it is:

STANDARDS

I’ve certainly turned a guy or two around by letting them know: this is club pussy. Members only. And membership is exclusive. You need to sign a contract with a non-compete. Here’s the like... and if you aren’t willing to fall in?

If he isn’t emotionally available...
Get the details, girl. 
I recommend behind understanding but not blindly accepting; is there somebody else in the mix? Are old wounds festering? Are personal challenges all-consuming? Is he working on getting himself ready for a relationship? What are his intentions? What are his intentions? What are his intentions?
You need to know before you start letting your feelings run away from you with this charmer. Feelings like to run before they walk sometimes, and you gotta get this convo out of the way before the rose colored lenses set in and all the red flags just look like flags.

If you are a good communicator and ask him clearly what the deal is and he just gives you some excuse? Or a sting of excuses? Or double talks or tip toes around the ducking point?

Answer

Have you talked to him about it? Like we you two are? Like do you guys posts about each other, do you know his family? Some guys like get to really know who they want to be in a relationship with. I know some guys like this. And maybe it is just for the sex idk. But I think you should talk to him about it.

Answer

yeahh this sounds similar to a situation of mine, he let me tell my parents and he told his but really he was just using me for sex even tho he told me he’d want a relationship in the future, however your situation could be different. communication is key!! just ask him what he wants to get out of you two talking, maybe say you don’t really wanna bring it up but you don’t want to get lead on either x

Answer

Have you asked him? At this point, he's the only one who can know what he's thinking. If you want to move things forward, gather your courage and ask him to make it official.

WHY HE WONT COMMIT

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