Ectopic Pregnancy

I found out i was pregnant on January 7th 2020. I have to admit i was very scared, I was 19 turning 20 in a few months, i haven’t graduated college yet but i am very close and i still live with my parents. The point is, despite my setbacks, i got over it, i had an amazing support team, and i was so excited. January 25th 2020 I was rushed to the ER with excruciating side pain. They told me it was ectopic, my fallopian tube ruptured and i needed emergency surgery. Since that day, i cry everyday. I see my scars everytime i look at my naked body in the mirror. And then i see that almost half of my fellow high school graduates are getting pregnant and having healthy babies. I feel so awful for feeling jealous. I envy all of them and I get to see all their growing bumps and newborn photos all over my facebook timeline. I’m no where near ready and won’t be for a few years but now that i’ve had a taste of what it’s like carrying a new life, i’m so hungry for another chance. I got the IUD in July so that when i’m ready i can decide when i want to take it out and start trying. But i am still very sad and depressed i don’t know what to do anymore. it’s been 9 months.