To try for a baby or not?

Question

I'm 40 yo with a child from previos relationship. My DS is 16, I love him dearly of course but I never had an easy time with him. As I was married to his father I was bullied by all in laws family including MDH and in 3 years of marriage lost all of my confidence or self respect. At a time I found enough strength to leave that toxic situation but as I was rebuilding myself , trying to survive ,  I hardly had enough space and energy to actually enjoy my motherhood fully. 
Now I am in a new loving relationship with the most amazing guy I ever met! He does not have kids, but wants us to try. I dont want to upset him and said yes to trying  knowing that , if I had a child i would love her and it could be my second ( and last ) chance to be a happy mother to a baby. But now as my child is grown, I really enjoy my freedom , I don't want sleepless night, lunch boxes , school nights and be tied to a house for years again. 
Your thoughts?

Answer

It sounds like you feel you missed out on the good parts of motherhood and want another opportunity at those. At the same time it sounds like you're also comfortable and grateful for your independence. 
Imo, you're asking to have the cake and eat it, too. You'll have to go through the sleepless nights and constant care that an infant requires to get to the good parts. 
If you really want a child you can weather though anything! Just don't expect not to have to do the dirty work to get there ;)

Answer

Age isn't really a factor,  I'm 42. There are genetic tests you can do early on now. Lifestyle is. Are you guys committed and in for the long haul? Are you on the same page with parenting style? We talked alot about what we both wanted today, tomorrow and in future. Not just about having a baby but raising that child and retirement and life we wanted

Answer

If you really want baby go for it ☺ speak to gp first about your ages and healthy good luck xxx

To try for a baby or not?

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