Help! *Possible trigger warning*

Firstly, I’m posting anonymously just incase there’s anyone that’d recognise me here due to the confidential side of my post.

Secondly, I hope that this doesn’t sound selfish as it’s not meant that way at all.

A little back Grandmother has been battling breast cancer for a few years and had surgery to remove her breast a month or so ago. They’ve now discovered that the cancer has spread and have given her between 3-6 months life expectancy ☹️

I’m a high risk pregnancy, currently at 32wks 2days. We suffered 3 losses last year so this baby is much longed for. Now I can’t help feeling guilty for counting down the days until we meet the baby. It’s as if I’m excited that time’s passing but then feel guilty that I’m happy about that when that also means my Grandmother’s time is running out. Im also really concerned about what impact this stress and upset may have on our little one.

I’ve no idea what I hope to achieve from posting, but I guess just to get this off my chest will help. I don’t feel that I can talk to my family about it