I really am losing all hope.

All I can think about, all I dream about , all that runs through my mind almost 24hours a day .. is being a mother .... I wish I could be so lucky to see two lines on a pregnancy test.. I wish I could tell my fiancé I’m pregnant and see the excited and happy look on his face and feel the excitement and joy of being able to bring a beautiful little baby into the world. But each month that passes and I’m not pregnant I feel my heart breaking a little bit more inside. I know that we are not actively 100% trying like <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android">tracking ovulation</a> and all of that sort of thing ... we are not preventing either... we said we will just see what happens and just have fun with it. We have been together 18months now. Never used birth control or contraception since being together .. so naturally I am feeling so defeated that we haven’t conceived. I just pray and pray for a miracle. 😔