Is this an unhealthy relationship or is it just me?
So I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years. We're both pretty young, (19 and 20) and he has a disability(he has rp which is an eye disease that causes blindness) which causes him to have alot of depression. I understand where he's coming from and how he feels. But he dropped out of college and doesn't want to go back because it's just not his thing, he also doesn't want to work. Like never work. That would be fine for some people but I've basically raised and supported my siblings all my life, cooking, cleaning, making sure they are okay.
I need to be taken care of too and I feel like it's just gonna be working while he sits around and plays videogames because that's how it's been all our relationship. He doesn't cook or clean, he sits and plays videogames all day.
We've talked about this and he said he's just too depressed and he's sorry but it's just not his thing.
This is all new aswell in the beginning of our relationship he wanted to be a scientist. But now he has no dreams, no aspirations. He won't get therapy. He won't do anything to possibly better himself. No fight in life. I don't know how to help him.
I watched my cousin go down the same path before overdosing on drugs. My cousin refused to get help. He also witnessed my cousin go this. My dad was also like this. I can't handle this again and he seems to not care.
I've brought up how I couldn't work(like I had to quit my job because I felt like I was going to kill myself that's how bad my depression was) a little while ago because the stress of cooking, cleaning, and making sure everything in my house is good and he blames my siblings and mom. And it'll be different when we're living together because he's not a mess maker like my siblings.
It just makes me feel like I'm his mom, I know in a relationship you care for your so but this feels like it's too much for me to deal with. Especially when the care isn't being reciprocated.
I feel like a horrible person for feeling like this is toxic and not right. Because what kind of person leaves a person when they are in need.
What's your opinion?
It's okay if you hate me for this.